60% of the $700 billion rip-off spent BEFORE BILL PASSED

On Friday, October 3, 2008 President Bush signed into law the $700 billion rescue plan. The day before, on Thursday, $430-billion had already been doled out!

We’ve heard of ex-post facto, but this is a new one – ex-pre facto, I guess you could call it.

Bush to the rescue

The bailout plan is Bush’s going away gift to Goldman Sachs and the rest of his buddies. It is the biggest robbery in the history of the – well, of the earth, I guess you could say.

Like eager children, Goldman Sachs, and the other Bush buddies just could not wait – they had to unwrap at least part of their gift one day early.

Neel Kashkari

Neel Kashkari (rhymes with “cash ‘n carry”), a 35 year old from Goldman Sachs (natch), was appointed by Goldman-Sachs-man Treasury Secretary Henry Paulson to head of the Office of Financial Stability. Neel will be the guy to pass out the dough. He got an early start, with the $430-billion already passed out.

OK, now for some much-needed comic relief. Only a small portion of the 442 pages that comprise the bill have anything to do with the $700-billion – most of the bill consists of neatly wrapped presents.

In addition to Goldman Sachs, and other Bush buddies, let’s see who gets a slice of the pie from the ‘‘Emergency Economic Stabilization Act of 2008’’.

• For Main Street – SEC. 122. increases the limit on the public debt to $11,315,000,000,000.’’
• For bicycle riders – “QUALIFIED BICYCLE COMMUTING REIMBURSEMENT.”
• For top-loading laundry users – $75 credit for residential top loading clothes washer manufactured in calendar year 2008 which meets or exceeds a 1.72 modified energy factor and does not exceed a 8.0 water consumption factor. The term ‘top-loading clothes washer’ means a clothes washer which has the clothes container compartment access located on the top of the machine and which operates on a vertical axis.
• For electronic scrap guys - A deduction – For purposes of clause (i), the term ‘electronic scrap’ means any cathode ray tube, flat panel screen, or similar video display device with a screen size greater than 4 inches measured diagonally, or any central processing unit.
• For all you motorsport fans - SEVEN-YEAR COST RECOVERY PERIOD FOR MOTORSPORTS RACING TRACK FACILITY.
• For the junkies – SUBSTANCE USE DISORDER BENEFITS.—‘‘SEC. 2705. PARITY IN MENTAL HEALTH AND SUBSTANCE USE DISORDER BENEFITS.’’.
• For the wool lovers – SEC. 325. EXTENSION AND MODIFICATION OF DUTY SUSPENSION ON WOOL PRODUCTS
• For Hollywood – Sec. 502. Provisions related to film and television productions.